Thursday, November 27, 2003
tmr s my dinner n dance.. n wat the hell.. i dunno wat clothes to wear.. wat shoe to wear... haha.. went to yunx house juz now to look for clothes.. haiz.. yunx they all r clubbin on sat.. but i have to forego it... i cant go.. =(
wat a weird day after yesterday... yesterday was an ok day.. managed to talk to her... get things started at least?? so that tmr nite would not b so bad... ok..
next thing to worry bout is my job.. I NEED A JOB V BADLY!! anyone out there who has a job pls lemme know.. i wanna work!!! hope cel can get the job for the clayyers... juz by givin out phamplet.. 8.5 an hr!! how to get such a great deal?? mayb theres something to do in return?? hahaha.. i dunno....
ya la!! i miss my clayyers!! mised the times i can get crazy with them... dun forget me k!! i will b back to join u all one day!!! i juz simply love them!!!! yup! n dun say i neva mention u... i love u too!! *muacks*
intoxicated* ||| 7:10:00 PM
Tuesday, November 25, 2003
finally bloggin now... haha.. many things happen during the times when i was not bloggin... mixed feelins circlin arnd me now... feelin happy.. sad.. scared...
i may juz lose him anytime now... wat should i do?? who is goin to scold me for goin out too often in future?? who is goin to say that my skirt is too short?? who is goin to tell me that the world outside is too ugly for me??? prob no one... anytime anywhere... i have the fear of losin him... neva seein him ever again... always stayin by my side for the past 16 yrs... can i imagine a day without him?? can i imagine a day without his naggin?? can i imagine a day without his phone calls?? no i cant.. even if i can... i chose not to... too impt a person for me to lose.. cant afford it... at this desperate point of time... i m willin to do anything everything juz to keep him by my side... i promise... i juz wan to give him a good life from now onwards... i wan to see the smlie back on his face like wat he used to have... juz wanna let him know i really love him... he juz CANT LEAVE ME!!!
finally my supps r over.... cant wait for it to b over at first.. but felt like a lost sheep after everythings over... dunno wats my next step... can i pass my supp?? wat if i cant pass??? do i go poly??? so i retain??? i dunno... all i can do is juz wait... meanwhile i can work to help them... those little angels who have been makin sure that we r fine all these while... juz wanna blame myself for being so spoilt!! cant even work now!! whatever job i have i complain... does it really lie on the job or me?? m i too fussy?? y cant i juz b more sensible n carry on workin like any other kids!!! juz gimme anothe rchance k??? i really can do it!!! i promise!!!
wat made me most happy was the ppl around me... my so sweet frenz n him... always there for me... i realise that i m not in this alone... everyone is with me... juz when i needed help i see a hand... juz when i wanna cry i see a piece of tissue rite there for me... i juz have to thank god for all these.. thats the reason y i have not given up all these while...
a little advice to all my love ones... even for those readin this or even juz passin by... juz treasure wat u have now... neva even regret it until he or she is gone.. ITS JUZ TOO LATE!! rem... they love u more than u love them... u r lucky that they r still with u... treasure them reallly well now.... trust me.. u will juz feeli like shit after all these r gone...
intoxicated* ||| 6:07:00 PM
